the Artist's bleeding Heart

Have you ever been ask to alter a picture against your own imagination, against what you were sure will look good?
Were you forced to do it, because the person who asked for it was your teacher, professor or boss?
Did your heart bleed when you did that?

Of course, I know, your heart doesn't actually bleed.

But I drew this picture in a try to capture that feeling I had. The loss of artistical orientation.
The moment, when you realise that you cannot be sure anymore if it looks good or bad.
It hurts somewhere deep, deep inside and it is really difficult to put it into words. Maybe "bleeding", or "melting" is the best way to describe it.


I do know, I have great troubles to deal with critic, espacially, if I am not allowed to offer any alternatives which I have considered good enough to further work with. So perhaps you don't know that feeling of "slowly melting" on the inside. Consider yourself lucky, it's not very pleasant, anyway.

However, since it occurs to me only every now and then, this time I wouldn't let it fade into memory, but use it as a topic for a drawing. Hehe... you probably think now: " Wow, to thoughtful!" Oh well, I drew it during the maths lecture. The motif is important to me, nonetheless.

Drawn with pencil, Stabilo (thanks, fellow student)
and overdone with Topaz Clean 3 for PSE 5.0

If you like to alter the picture with further effects, filters, textures and such, go ahead!
I'd love to see what you can make out of it, though, so please send me the link to your piece.